I tend to live my social life in the bus lane rather than the fast lane, but last night was an exception. My sister Ali - who is visiting from Oz and who provided the title for this post - accompanied us to Singapore's hottest new nightspot, the Lantern bar on the rooftop of its newest (and fabulously smart) hotel, the Fullerton Bay.
It was one of those perfect Singapore evenings - not too hot, a nice bit of breeze, some atmospheric, but not intrusive, Latino sounds and the most stunning views! The picture to the left was taken from my iPhone and looks great on a small screen but loses some definition on the page, so you'll either have to take my word for the stunning nature of the views or come and see for yourself. I've never been to a bar with a swimming pool, but this bar has everything. I say everything, but if I were to be picky - actually I don't need to be, as Chris can be picky enough for both of us when he is in a grumpy mood (sorry, C) - the food was a bit disappointing. Early days to be fair, as we were actually there on their first night of opening, but they had a very limited menu to start with, did not have several of the items available, and had not bothered to tell the staff. That said, the food that we did manage to order was yummy. Ali and I had a double order of lobster tacos - a miniature version of a normal taco, filled with lobster, spookily enough, in a yummy sauce - and would probably have eaten several more had we not decided to head out for dinner to Marina Bay Sands, the newest of Singapore's casinos, for a spot of dinner (see below for a view from our rooftop bar). This is an amazing looking place, and opinion is most definitely divided between the lovers and the haters, but I'm a fan. If you'd like to see a much better picture and get a real sense of the thing that looks like a ship on top of three tall buildings, then go to: http://www.marinabaysands.com/.
A simple supper
So we thought. Well, less is more
after all. How true.
Rain. In Singapore. Not unheard of, you are thinking, and you would be right of course. Singapore is pretty well set up for rain in fact, with storm drains all over the place and a number of big reservoirs to catch and keep the watery stuff. So what happened last Wednesday to produce these pictures?
A flash flood, that's what, compounded by a blocked drain, apparently, resulting in complete havoc in parts of the city centre. Not only were the basement car parks flooded, but, as you can see from the photos, so were the streets. This photo shows the part of town near where we live - luckily, we are on a bit of a hill, and on the 22nd floor, so no danger of getting the tootsies wet. Apparently, almost 100 mm of rain fell within a two-hour period - more than half a month's worth, in the space of less than a morning.
Spooky that it should happen once, but then it happened again this week. First thing in the morning again (and I missed the whole thing, as I had gone in early to work). It was all quite dramatic, with fallen trees blocking roads and turning the morning commute into an obstacle course. Singapore's water agency - the wonderfully named PUB - recorded 100mm of rain in an hour this time, the same amount as the previous week, but in half the time. I wasn't aware rain could fall that fast.
There is a Latin motto "Nemo me impune lacessit" which the Scots (a race to which I am proud to belong) have translated into "Wha dare meddle wi' me" and which this Scot, after the day that I have had, would render as something completely unprintable.
So why am I in such a bad mood, you ask, living as I do in permanent summer, in the land of the mango and the papaya (not that they grow here, but the shops are full of them), with the lovely Chris and the almost as lovely Lola, the best dog in the world? Well, let's start with Bonkers Bank, shall we? A bank of which I have been a "premier" customer for the last 20 years, and who now see fit to transfer me from pillar to post, in ever decreasing circles of competence, instead of responding to my legitimate request to transfer my money to another bank. As requested, I sent them a letter making the request, then when they could not find that letter, I sent them another one. When they could not find that, they asked me to fax them a copy of the letter, which I did, and to phone up afterwards to check that they had received the letter, which I did. After all that, were they able to help me? Of course not, which is why I am in such a bad mood. I feel like a character in a Kafka novel, going round in circles. Will I ever see this money again, or am I doomed to make an endless round of phone calls to people whose idea of helping me is to give me a number to call and leave a message after which someone will call me back within 3 hours? Don't you just love Service Level Agreements?
I know that I am sounding like my good friend Steve, whose blog you really should read, (http://blogfromthebarn.blogspot.com/) and who is prone to the occasional rant and/or fit of grumpiness, but my patience - to be fair, not a particularly strong suit of mine - has been tried beyond reason. It really does bring home the reality of outsourcing core functions like customer service when the result is that both constructs - "customer" and "service" are washed away in a sea of learned helplessness. I think a haiku is called for:
Loyal customer?
I don't think so, Bonkers Bank
Why? Because you're crap.
Who would have thought what, you ask? At least I hope you do, as that means you continue to read and wonder at the exploits of Izinsing. So what have I been up to recently? Well, strangely enough, lawn bowls. Having previously mastered the arts of croquet, petanque and boules - it appears that there is a difference between these last two, all to do with the position of the feet, as it happens - it was time to acquire some grass stains on the lawn bowling green. This turned out to be a bit tricky, since the green in question is not actually grass, but some fancy green (well, obviously) synthetic material.
Chris and I played at the Tanglin Club, which has an amazing green, situated on the roof of the sports centre. I'm not sure if you know much about bowling, (I didn't know anything at all) but the green is structured in "rinks" or playing strips, of which the Tanglin has either six or eight, depending whether they are set up east to west or north to south. Chris and I turned up on the day of a match, so we were given some instruction by the lovely Roger, and left to ourselves to practice on the end rink, which we managed to do relatively successfully, only straying into the path of the players next to us a couple of times. The game itself is relatively straightforward, but getting the hang of the bowl, which is designed to travel a curved path, takes a while. There is the opportunity to practice in the week, which we haven't managed to do yet, but even if we do, I can't see us representing the club in competition any time soon.
When I say fish, I'm not talking about eating fish, I'm talking about fish eating me. To be precise, I'm talking about a fish spa, which I tried out for the first time last Sunday. At a fish spa, Doctor fish (species name Garra rufa) nibble away at the dead skin on your feet to leave them lovely and smooth. Chris and I went along with a new friend, the lovely Ann Marie, a fellow Scot who has recently moved to Singapore. Both of us were fish spa virgins, as was Chris, who was a bit doubtful initially, but we all got into the spirit of the thing once we were there. The thing about this particular fish spa that we were not expecting was the fact that there were three sizes of fish - little baby doctors (a ticklish nuzzle, quite pleasant once you got over the initial feeling of "What was I thinking?"), then mini doctors, more like a small electric shock, but in a good way, then the consultants, the big swinging dicks of the fish spa world, whose teeth you could feel as they gave your feet a seeing to, and who gave us a nip or two along the way. Not unpleasant, but we were glad to have had the nuzzling and nibbling first. The picture below shows the babies giving Ann Marie a ticklish introduction to the world of the piscatorial pedicure.
Each size of fish was in a separate tank, and when you had had enough of one, you moved on to the other. The three of us stayed together and each time we moved on, Chris attracted the most fish, then me, then Ann Marie. We couldn't work out why. Very odd. Would I do it again? I certainly would and I commend it to all of you who have never experienced it. It gives a whole new meaning to the words "Fish Supper" (my Scottish friends will know what I mean).
A message from Lola
Iz's regular readers may have noticed that Chris contributed the last post, so I thought to myself, he's not the only one with views on our life here in Singapore, so why don't I have a go? It wasn't hard to persuade Iz (I can wrap her round my little paw) and she very kindly agreed to help me with the typing, so sit back and enjoy this view from the ground - well, a foot or so off the ground if you want to be really picky.
One of the things I love best about Singapore is the smells. OK, so I know I'm a dog and dogs have a great sense of smell, (which is just as well really, considering our eyesight is crap), but there is so much going on in the olfactory department in Singapore that it's an absolute paradise for us doggies. There's the other dogs, for a start. I live in a pretty smart apartment complex and there are lots of us here, although I am the only black and silver mini Schnauzer, as well as being the favourite of all the security guards. Every time I'm taken out for a pee, I sniff round for one of the other doggies to play with. I have some special friends, and I'd know their smell a mile away. There's Benny, the little Maltese and Lucky, who's a lot bigger than I am, and Jasper, who is an absolutely HUGE golden Labrador, who lets me climb all over him while he just stands there - I think he's too old to run away.
And then there are the food smells, of course. You've probably heard that the two favourite pastimes of Singaporeans are shopping and eating, and while I can't tell you much about the first, as I've never actually been shopping, I get taken out to Lola friendly restaurants sometimes and even though I don't get to eat there (Iz is very strict about what she calls "people food") I can still enjoy the smells. My favourite place is an Italian restaurant called La Braceria. It's one of Iz's favourites, and we go there quite often. I get to sit outside and bark at the cats who live in the area - great fun! I think Italian is probably my favourite sort of people food, although I am partial to smoked salmon and a bit of duck confit as well.
This post is kindly contributed by Chris Kiddy (except for the bits I added).
The first of the two Singaporean casinos opened a couple of months ago and the next one is due to open shortly, although, according to the Today newspaper, it has not yet received its licence, just three days before the planned soft opening.
We visited the first of the casinos shortly after it opened, at Resorts World on the island of Sentosa. It was actually our second visit, the first having occurred by accident when it was still being built and we took a wrong turning while heading for somewhere else on Sentosa and found ourselves in a vast, unlit, unsignposted cavern that turned out to be a huge underground car park for the resort. This time, having parked in the now completed car park (much friendlier with lighting and signs, but still absolutely vast), we took a bus from our parking spot to the casino - yes really - and joined a heaving mass of people queuing to get in. And I can't for the life of me work out why.
Those of you who are regular readers will know how besotted we are with Lola, our mini Schnauzer. We have had her since last Chinese New Year and so we decided to buy her a New Year gift this year. But what do you buy for a small dog who already has a wonderful life and, it must be said, relatively limited needs? A designer dog bowl, of course. My sister and I had seen this on a previous shopping trip (the same day we found ourselves in a Japanese store called "Daiso" and confused the staff completely by keeping asking for the price of things. Nothing had a price label on it, for the very good reason that everything cost 2 dollars, as we discovered when we got to the checkout and the assistant just counted up the number of items in our basket and multiplied them by 2. Before that point, however, we had been muttering darkly about the quality of the saucepans, as you do before you realise that the pan you have in your hand is the same price as a Mars Bar).
You an tell from the picture that Lola's bowl did not come from the 2 dollar store - at least I hope you can. If not, please email me your address so that I can send the designer police round to arrest you right away. The bowl is from the Alessi store and, coincidentally, is called "Lula". It was love at first sight - for the bowl and me. Lola, on the other hand, was deeply suspicious and had to be persuaded to eat from it. She's fine with it now though, and it still makes my heart sing.
Dear readers
Gong Xi Fa Cai! Those of you who have been following our adventures since we arrived in Singapore, may realise that this is our 3rd Chinese New Year (henceforth shortened to CNY in this post) here. I find it hard to believe myself, but the fact that I dressed all in red yesterday and spent much of the morning giving out pairs of oranges in the office tells me that it must be so. Mandarin oranges are everywhere at this time of year. All public buildings and most private ones feature decorations that include beautiful displays of red and yellow flowers, and orange trees, like the one below. These come in all sizes, and the big ones (10 feet tall or thereabouts) are incredibly expensive.
Oranges are a symbol of wealth, because of the colour, and the shape symbolizes unity and perfection. The giving and receiving of oranges is a key part of the new year celebrations. These last for 15 days, so you need a lot of fruit for a fortnight's worth.
We are about to leave the Year of the Ox and enter the Year of the Tiger. Now I really rather like the idea of being born in the Year of the Tiger - such a noble beast - beautiful, fast and stripey too. What's not to like? But apparently some Chinese couples prefer not to have babies in Tiger years, which is a real concern for Singapore, which already has a worrying low birth rate. In the last 3 Tiger years (1974,1986 and 1998 for the anoraks amongst you), the number of births dipped by 7%. That's bad news, but there is even worse news for the poor tiger. Because of the illicit trade in tiger meat (yes, you read right), it seems that the wild tiger may be extinct by the time the next year of the tiger comes round, in 2022. And it's not just the meat that is sought after - according to the Today newspaper "Tiger bone tonic wine has become a fashionable cocktail to serve among the nouveau riche in countries like China". Remind me to insist on diet Pepsi the next time I'm partying in Shanghai.
This weekend also sees the opening of the first of the "integrated resorts" - Resorts World on Sentosa. The concept of the integrated resort was born when the notion of bringing casinos to Singapore (previously gambling free) was agreed. The casinos are integrated into a complex of hotels, shopping and dining opportunities and, in the case of Resorts World, a Universal Studios theme park. Entry is free for tourists and those who are not citizens or Permanent Residents, but Singaporeans and PRs have to pay 100 Singapore dollars per entry, or 2000 dollars for an annual pass. More on this later, as we're planning a trip when things quieten down a bit.
The first day of CNY this year falls on Valentine's day and Chris is taking me off to the Scarlet Hotel - in Singapore - for the night. I've never had a mini break (more of a micro break really) in the same city that I live in before, but the travelling bit should be easy, particularly since the roads are deserted on New Year's Day. The hotel promises all manner of sensual delights in the "love to love you, baby" Valentine's experience, including "Lover's amenities" whatever they might be! Watch this space, and read about the hotel yourself at http://www.thescarlethotel.com/
Actually, let's Ceroc. Ceroc has come to Singapore and I am just back from the introductory workshop, run by the lovely (and extremely lithe) Katie. Katie actually lives in Hong Kong, but she is over here drumming up interest in this wonderful dance. If you ever went to France and saw people dancing "le rock", then you know what Ceroc is. If you have never experienced it before, allow me to explain.
It is pretty much a fusion of jive and salsa, but probably quite a bit simpler than either and was invented in London - fascinating fact coming up - by the grandson of the Scottish writer A J Cronin, the creator of the famous Dr Finlay! Here is a clip of some aficionados in a shopping centre in the UK (don't ask), giving it some Ceroc welly.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-P7Igr81DEg
The workshop in Singapore lasted for a couple of hours, and because Katie was in town over the weekend, I arranged for her to give me a private lesson. She came round to the apartment on Sunday evening and I managed to solidify ( I think) the steps that I had learned the day before. Since I appear to have been born with two left feet - but in my imagination I'm capable of winning Strictly Come Dancing - it could take some time to pick up a whole routine.......
It was one of those perfect Singapore evenings - not too hot, a nice bit of breeze, some atmospheric, but not intrusive, Latino sounds and the most stunning views! The picture to the left was taken from my iPhone and looks great on a small screen but loses some definition on the page, so you'll either have to take my word for the stunning nature of the views or come and see for yourself. I've never been to a bar with a swimming pool, but this bar has everything. I say everything, but if I were to be picky - actually I don't need to be, as Chris can be picky enough for both of us when he is in a grumpy mood (sorry, C) - the food was a bit disappointing. Early days to be fair, as we were actually there on their first night of opening, but they had a very limited menu to start with, did not have several of the items available, and had not bothered to tell the staff. That said, the food that we did manage to order was yummy. Ali and I had a double order of lobster tacos - a miniature version of a normal taco, filled with lobster, spookily enough, in a yummy sauce - and would probably have eaten several more had we not decided to head out for dinner to Marina Bay Sands, the newest of Singapore's casinos, for a spot of dinner (see below for a view from our rooftop bar). This is an amazing looking place, and opinion is most definitely divided between the lovers and the haters, but I'm a fan. If you'd like to see a much better picture and get a real sense of the thing that looks like a ship on top of three tall buildings, then go to: http://www.marinabaysands.com/.
